Happy Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

by | Feb 11, 2023 | Love Consciousness, Relationships

Introduction

Happy Valentine’s Day! No matter how bleak things may appear, Love is always in the air, and at least once annually, we tune into it en masse.

There’s great power when we come together in like mind and intention. Let’s use this Valentine’s Day to our combined best interests. What the world needs now more than ever is a huge injection of Love, Love, Love, because Love causes people to see, be and do our best.

Yes, I am aware that Valentine’s Day love points toward romantic Love, but it too, is sourced in True or Unconditional Love. For this week’s blog, it came to me to look into the million-bazillion love quotes online, choose a few possibly worth your time, quotes worth a pause, a mindful inhale, and breathing into the world stage on the exhale.

A Community Valentine

Let’s create a community Valentine to send out to all human beings everywhere. Of course, if this is not your thing, or you need to change the quote to your preference, feel free. Please share my blog with those you think or feel would resonate. Thank you. Okay. Here we go.

“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing. Love is knowing I am Everything, and between the two my life moves.”

Maharaj Nisargadatta

“Valentine’s Day is just another day to love like there is no tomorrow.”

Unknown

 “Love recognizes no barriers, it jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination, full of hope.”

Maya Angelou

 “There’s no bad consequence to loving fully, with all your heart. You always gain by giving love.”

  Reese Witherspoon

 “Loving is not just looking at each other, it’s looking in the same direction.”

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

“Love may be harder to find in some people, but when they do love, you know it must be something marvelous.”

Criss Jami, Killosophy

“To love everyone unconditionally does not mean to give everyone your unconditional time. Sometimes, to love completely, we must never see someone again. This, too, is love. This is giving someone the freedom to exist and be happy, even if it must be without you.”

Vironika Tugaleva

 “The end of wisdom is Love, Love, Love.”

Ramana Maharshi

Love! There is no falling in or out of it. It’s in and all around us all the time. It’s who we are. If you don’t already know, don’t believe me. Hone your attention on it and watch it come to life.

Do you have a favorite quote on Love? Leave share it in the comments. Thank you in advance for your wisdom.

Happy Valentine’s Day with Love,
Kaye Sturgis

Discerning What is Real from What is Not

Discerning What is Real from What is Not

by | Nov 13, 2022 | Love Consciousness, Relationships, Spirituality

Introduction 

The inspiration for this week’s blog, Discerning What is Real from What is Not, came years ago. It happened when the time came to move on from a group I was in that was inspired by Ancient Hawaiian wisdom. I had spent a few years of my life diving deep into that treasure, and I had mixed feelings about leaving. My teacher and I met to say goodbye.

We wished each other well, and, as a parting wisdom pearl, he reminded me that wherever my future work might take me, to be sure to base it in Reality. I have been nearly obsessed with Essential Truth since I can remember, so his suggestion worked for me, and here I am sharing it with you. As usual, keep what works and toss the rest.

Reality

Reality with a capital “R” points to pure authenticity, presence, or how things are instead of how they are thought, felt, or believed. The perceiving reality we’ve come to trust, know and believe in is frequently misinformation at best and filled with assumptions, underlying traumas, distortions of all shapes and sizes, and more. It’s much like looking in a mirror through a dense fog. You can see – barely.

So, there’s a bigger Reality that reflects the way things Really are and the smaller reality, which is a trickster. There’s a significant difference between the two. Here, I’m making a stab at writing how to show just that. I don’t know if there’s a more vital tool to be had. 

How to discern what is Real from what is not can be consciously learned if one is curious, flexible, and grateful for a new perspective that might work better in navigating this stuff than the old.

I have attempted to balance the Freedom of Love Consciousness and Joy that blessed me in my childhood Near Death Experience (NDE) with my life in this world that very often appeared contrary.

In recent years, this drawing and quartering between the two realities finally began to collapse as I practiced seeing through the eyes of Reality instead of assumption.

Parasites! Oh My!

I discovered what was in the way were parasitic attachments implanted into my body/mind via my ancestors, genetics, parents, environment, time and space, etc. Before you think I’ve gone off the deep end, give me another minute. I first read about the parasite in Don Miquel Ruiz’s excellent book on the subject back in the day before most talked about such things. Beyond fear is the name of the book. In it, I first read about the parasite that plagues humans and instantly recognized the Reality of its message.

These so-called parasites are often referred to as egoic tendencies, shadows, malu, wetiko, and demons as life-taking energetic influences. Seeing them as such makes them easier to understand. They often show up as thoughts and feelings that appear genuine but are not. These life-taking energies can grab us or whisper painful dispatches of fear, all of which are distractions from our True or Real Value or Worthiness. When we listen to them, we give them our power. Refuse to fear them.

They push their dysfunctional narratives to no good end and try to get us to attach to their always life-taking point of view, which is never Real. No matter what the trigger, it is always connected to pain. You can be sure the parasite communicates its presence when you feel triggered by physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual pain. What is it telling you? Don’t be afraid of it. It’s okay to stop, look and listen. When you see it clearly, it will dissolve and disappear.

When you have no buttons to push.  

When you no longer have internal “buttons,” there is nothing to push. To get rid of these triggering parasites, we must learn to see them for what they are, and when we do, they will dissolve to a necessary extent. Poof!

If it has to be believed. 

At some point and one by one, a few teachers of enlightenment began to appear on my life path. And each suggested belief and attachment are only needed for those things that are not True or Real. If it has to be believed, look elsewhere for the Truth.

True and Reality are Recognized within our Hearts as being so. We don’t have to believe in this balanced life-serving energy. It just is IF we learn to filter this way. It is simple. The internationally renowned organic spa, Rancho la Puerta in Baja, California, puts the following on a card and places it on a table in every guestroom. “Every choice is for life or death. What will be yours?”

Beliefs can be burdensome, whether small to large. Here are a couple of examples.

I went to three nurseries looking for a “High Geranium”. The first two said they didn’t carry them, but thankfully, the third nursery asked me to describe the plant. It turns out that I was asking for a Hydrangea, not a High Geranium! I formed this belief as a child when I misunderstood my grandmother say my favorite flower’s name. Human life is full of misunderstandings and assumptions.

Beliefs from Trauma

Some people have a series of bad relationships and grow to believe they can’t have a successful one. Beliefs that form out of traumatic life-taking experiences affect every layer of our lives, and sometimes, what’s worse, we forget they even happen, and we find ourselves in pain we didn’t know was there. Thus, we find ourselves acting in ways we don’t understand, dazed and confused.

As we ferret out the beliefs and suspend them one by one, we become intensely flexible superhumans filled with the inner freedom that comes from accepting things as they are. In this state, we are no longer attached or susceptible to the toxic energy once generated by the life sucker.

Expanded Awareness lends to Unconditional Love and Forgiveness, Non-Attachment, and Compassion. When we drop the weight of the morality of belief, we Realize that there is no good/bad/right/wrong in the essential essence of life. We are Love, Light, and Life and can relax.

An experiment:

Here’s a little experiment. As you progress through the week, pay attention to what you believe about yourself, your life, your behavior, those around you, your finances, your health, etc. Okay. Now, what if you didn’t have to change any of those beliefs? All you need to do is let them go.

One at a time or all at once, for an hour here and there, an hour a day, or continuously let those beliefs go. Relax without them. Let them go. Do it enough, and two things will emerge, your superpowers and the joy of a childlike and free existence. What’s Real will remain. You will still be You. You will also be Free to be You.

It is true freedom to know and understand what is Real rather than relying on the stagnant energy of belief. You can Trust what is Real to shine through and are empowered to ferret out the toxic stuff that isn’t Real. We do not need an intercessor between ourselves and what is Real. Together, this will help us humans fulfill the roles we came here to play without fear.

Conclusion

Sometimes, I have an idea for a blog, such as discerning what is Real from what is not. While something like this sounds like a great subject, it is relatively new for me to put into words. I know others can do it better, and I also know that I am compelled to share everything I have come to know and understand in life that may help others along the way. So here you have it. I encourage you to do the same.

See you next week. Leave a comment if you wish.

Mucho Love to the Releasing of Beliefs, especially the toxic ones!
Kaye

Five Wisdom Pearls for Successfully Navigating Relationships

Five Wisdom Pearls for Successfully Navigating Relationships

by | Oct 22, 2022 | Love Consciousness, Near-Death Experiences, Relationships

Introduction 

In this week’s blog, we peer into five wisdom pearls for successfully navigating relationships. I will cover things not usually looked at in articles on relationships. It is because our relationships are, all in all, inside jobs. ALL our encounters with others are reflections of our relationship with our True Self. This topic has held my attention not only as a Libran but also as a Near Death Experiencer (NDEr), and I am not the only one. There are tens of thousands of Near Death Experiencers who, when they briefly died, experienced what is commonly called a life review. Life reviews contain a personal review of one’s human life in the Presence of what appear to be Loving Spiritual Guides.

You may wonder what life reviews, or NDEs, have to do with relationships. After reading and hearing many life reviews from speakers at the Virginia Beach Chapter of the International Association for Near-Death Studies (VBIANDS) meetings, I finally saw the connection. One Saturday morning, it dawned on me as I sat in the audience listening to yet another talk on the subject. No one has ever had a life review concerning work, religion, education, health, habits, or money.

Life Review — Single-Pointed Focus

No. Instead, life review focuses on one thing and one thing only; how we treat others, ALL others, in our lives, from our most intimate of lifelong connections to the seemingly random stranger we pass on the street.  

In his life review, among many memories, one NDEr remembered changing a flat tire on his truck. In the memory, a car stopped and offered assistance. The NDEr looked up, not answering but scowled at the driver. Years later, long after he had forgotten, it came up in his life review.

Only this time, the NDEr felt the man’s feelings, who only wanted to help. He also felt the driver absorb his bad mood and took that mood home to his wife and family. He also felt the wife’s and children’s inner responses to it. All this from a scowl in a stressed-out space? He was mortified (no pun intended!) by his behavior. He forgave himself the Reality of the event, but not before he felt his part in full as things occurred from a more significant picture point of view.

The NDEr was a changed man when he returned to human life, where he made a conscious decision to treat people with the utmost respect. Thus, he touched the hearts of nearly everyone he encountered from that point on. This story was but a tiny piece of his life review.

Navigating relationships successfully is, and will be, hands down, the True Measure of our human lives!  

One more time. Soak it in.

Navigating relationships successfully is, and will be, hands down, the True Measure of our lives! For what we do unto others, we do unto ourselves.  

Never more true is this than in our life and life review. Natural authenticity and balance between ourselves and others are essential to our inner health (and theirs) and well-being now and in our combined future.

Five Wisdom Pearls for Successfully Navigating Relationships 

Our ideas about how we’re conditioned and taught to treat each other in relationships have created a world dream of misinformation and a dysfunctional world community based on lies. And we can see it doesn’t work.

No matter what kind of relationship shows up, there might always be challenges to face and obstacles to overcome. We can trust that we may not get what we want, but we always get what we need. Integrating the following five wisdom pearls helps us to remember who we are — in any relationship.

1. Understand What a Relationship Is and Isn’t

Relationships are, in Truth, figments of our collective imagination. In Truth, we are One. But in the Dream World of Duality, they are all too real. They give us the warm fuzzies, push our buttons, and in all ways, trigger our best and our worst, too.

They are serious in their relentless reflections on ourselves to wake us up to who we really are, while showing us who we are not in the process. When we move through what relationships have to Really offer us, there is no limit to the freedom we can experience within and with the other in whatever capacity we are related.

A relationship is never something that can be controlled. Nor can we change anyone. People come as they are. The connection is simply a space where two people come together and interact. If someone disrespects you, it’s just to let you know to treat or love yourself more.

See it for what it is, and the Truth about the mirrors will shine through the muck and the mire. Each person brings baggage, experiences, and perspectives into any relationship, which either adds or subtracts from the quality of the relationship. But, there is no Other.

2. A Reality-based perspective on relationships

The life review lets us know that all we need in life are mirrors in the form of “other.” We are here to Wake Up to the Love Consciousness we Are, and to the extent that we’re missing the mark, the mirror of another will let us know where and how via triggers of life-taking influences.

Our rough edges get hewed smooth through working through these trauma dramas. What was once a diamond spirit in the wild rough now shines the unfathomable brilliance of the Absolute and Love Consciousness made manifest in us. We’re all One playing the game of “Let’s Wake Up to Love via Relationship Mirrors.”

3. Let the benefits motivate you to stay the course.

As already discussed, the maximum benefit for successfully navigating your relationships keeps you in a state of joy here and in your life review. From a spiritual viewpoint, there’s a synergy when both parties are in harmony and tap into Unconditional Love.

This is true whether it shows up as a kind connection with a stranger, a community service, hammering out a business plan with a partner, a flirty first date full of promise, or the transformation of a long-term relationship to its next chapter.

The human dimension of relationships isn’t forgotten. We help each other with our basic needs and desires, i.e., raising families, creating productive lives, and sharing with like-minds in a worthwhile society. Our core passion for giving and receiving love reaches fulfillment in those present moments/weeks/months and years when we are in harmony with All That Is (and All That Isn’t). There is Everything to gain and nothing but pain and suffering to lose. What could be more beneficial than that when you go deeper into the purpose of relationshipping?

4. Get Real – Expectations

One of the most important things you can do in any friendship, personal relationship, or business partnership is to get real with yourself. Be honest with yourself and others about your thoughts, feelings, boundaries, and expectations. If hounded by past trauma in life, don’t be ashamed. Find the help that works for you until you release it.

Even if due diligence happens, partners tend to have or develop unique expectations of each other. Know what to expect from your significant other by eliciting each other’s values early on.

5. Super Healers That Foster a Cooperative Spirit

Specific tools can help foster a cooperative spirit within any relationship. These include what I call Super Healers: Love, Humility (Flexibility), Forgiveness, Gratitude, Listening, Compassion, Authenticity, Respect, and Boundaries. There are many more. An annual study began on one of these at the beginning of each year is highly recommended. Install them into your lifelong conditioning. I have done this myself off and on. Each practice has been utterly transformative. When these Super Healers are utilized, it’s much easier to work through challenges and disagreements. 

Conclusion

Today, let’s apply these five wisdom pearls for successfully navigating our relationships, i.e., getting real, understanding what a relationship is and isn’t, managing expectations and benefits, and using tools that foster a cooperative spirit. We are likely to find that our relationships improve dramatically; we communicate better, profoundly connect and resolve conflicts more effectively. And, when it’s our time to go, our life review will reflect our efforts.

Comment on a relationship wisdom pearl of your own?

Love and Remembering Who You Are,
Kaye